I still remember that day when I first watched "You Know I'm No Good" for Amy Winehouse. At that time, I was just a young Egyptian girl who, like many Egyptians, know almost nothing about jazz. That day, I fell in love with the beats, the clip, jazz and of course that tattooed bold singer.
I had bad internet connections bad then. I did not know much about YouTube. I had just to wait all day long for airing her song. I can still remember the rush that I felt whenever I saw her video on the TV. Bold lyrics, great video with an unusual idea, great voice and lovely beats. By time, she got somewhat popular in Egypt. More songs were aired on TV and radio channels. Her music were excessively used in commercials and promos. The more I listened to her work, the more I fell in love with that phenomenon called "Amy Winehouse".
When I became more tech-savvy with access to the internet, I have searched for more for Amy. Like many others, I had to know about her problems and addiction. I felt sorry for that little girl; however, I never stopped admiring her. Even with all the stupid parodies, ridicule and massive media attention, I only saw that brilliant artist who, like other idols throughout history, had to deal with life's mischief in her own way.
I read the news of her death on Facebook and I could not believe myself. I actually wept while trying to comprehend what happened. I have never wept over a celebrity's death before, but I did that time. Not only I fell in love with her art once, she opened my eyes to that magical world of jazz. Whenever I listen to any of her songs, I can actually feel that her lyrics portray the ordeals any woman can ever face in that trivial world.
She was the one who said it loud "Love is a Losing Game." She had balls and stood up and sang "Rehab" while facing her own addiction dilemma for which she had been ridiculed and attacked till the end of her unforgettable life. She was the one who coyly tried to seek eternal love, when she sang "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?" Many other songs with amazing lyrics that sold millions of albums and captivated people's hearts for years when Amy did not release something new.
I wept when I saw all those sorrowful posts, letters and articles over her death. The woman is loved and she knew very little of that. While she was suffering of her own personal issues, people were competing to put her life through a lens, judge her, parody that fragile human being and call her a "drunk bitch".
I wept when I thought that that poor late lady saw all of that. The world gave up on her. It did not leave her alone. It did not help her survive. The world just behaved like an angry bully pushing constantly on her buttons.
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